Behavior Worksheets
This site is amazing, helps teach children important things in a way that is comprehensible as well as fun. I have found it effective with my child and I would recommend checking it out for printable charts and activities.
Thursday, August 12, 2010
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
STDs and children
Those two things should not be heard together, am I right? In a recent article on the Advocates for Youth website (www.advocatesforyouth.org), I found this gem (the entire article must be read to get the full effect of the message but it is truly outstanding):
Quote
Tuesday August 10, 2010
Should We Tell Our Kids that STDs are Normal?
by Martha Kempner
In a blog on Psychology Today’s website, Kathryn Stamoulis, a psychologist who specializes in adolescent sexuality and teens’ internet behaviors, suggests that it’s time we take the stigma out of sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) and start talking about them as a normal risk of a normal behavior. Her argument is quite logical: STDs are extremely prevalent in our society among both teens and adults, treating them like the ultimate social taboo does nothing to prevent teens from contracting them (years of abstinence-only-until-marriage programs and fear-based education have not reduced teen sex or the transmission of STDs), and what it may actually do is prevent teens from taking important steps to protect and treat themselves (like seeking out regular STD screening).
She suggests that STDs are a normal risk of sexual contact similar to how contracting a cold or a flu is a natural risk of being in close contact with others during the winter. “Just imagine what life would look like if people viewed STDs as a normal part of fooling around,” she writes. “Without fear of tarnishing his reputation, a teenage boy could tell his partner ‘you may not want to get too close to me this week; I'm clearing up a case of Chlamydia.’ Or a teen girl may view getting tested twice a year as routine as she does a teeth cleaning.”
She is absolutely right that stigma prevents many people from seeking the protective behaviors they need—be it buying condoms before having sex or getting tested for STDs afterwards. We do have to change our tone when talking about STDs to get rid of the shame and blame. STDs are a health issue; not a sign of poor morals or bad behavior.
But normal, is that taking it too far?
As a sexuality educator, I have spent a lot of time criticizing abstinence-only-until-marriage programs for their use of fear and shame especially when it comes to STDs. A common tactic of these programs is to show young people slides of STDs in their extremely advanced stages; cervixes that are dripping with pus or penises covered with cauliflower-sized warts. I do not think these are appropriate teaching tools for a number of reasons. First, they’re not particularly educational—these pictures represent late stages of STDs that in all honesty few people ever reach. If we do want to show young people pictures of STDs, at the very least we should be showing them those in the earliest stages in order to help them understand when to seek testing and treatment.
Second, the narration accompanying these slides often says things like “As a result of this Chlamydia infection, this young woman, even though she only had sex with one person, will never be able to have children.” Not only do such statements gloss over important information—like the fact that Chlamydia is easily cured with antibiotics if caught early and that even if caught later infertility can be averted—they also seem to suggest that the owner of the cervix in the picture is to blame for her predicament and, worse, is now damaged goods. Such message of fear and shame are always inappropriate.
Lastly, I think it is worth noting that those who support showing pictures of diseased genitals are the very same forces who try to censor any curriculum or book that shows pictures of naked people or healthy genitalia on the grounds that they are pornographic and not age-appropriate. This just further underscores the messages that sex, and even our bodies, are sources of shame.
As a mother who wants to protect her children from anything that causes pain or discomfort, though, I have to admit that calling STDs simply a normal part of fooling around makes me a little anxious. It is true that gonorrhea and Chlamydia can be treated easily, but other STDs, like Herpes, can cause recurring pain. And, we can’t forget about HIV which causes numerous medical issue and ultimately still leads to death.
I vividly remember an article I read when I was 14 about a 25-year-old woman who had a severe case of genital Herpes. She explained that urinating during an outbreak was so uncomfortable that she would not do it at work and would instead wait until the end of the day when she could do it as part of a shower or a bath to limit the pain. I don’t know whether the article was designed to scare me or simply to inform me but it sounded horrible enough that I vowed I would not get Herpes. To this day, I believe that some of my vigilance in protecting myself when I became sexually active came from that dread.
This is always one of the challenges of parenthood. How do we raise kids who have an awareness of and a respect for the dangers in the world without scaring them too much? Thus the balancing act. My daughter (who is 4) has to hold my hand when we’re walking in a parking lot because other drivers might not see her by herself and could “smush” her. She has to wear her seatbelt whenever we drive because it’s safer. And, she shouldn’t talk to strangers. I haven’t told her what would happen to her if she really did get smushed by a car, that people die in car accidents, or that some people are actually out to harm little kids. Some of these messages will come as she gets older and can understand more but I will try not to dwell on danger.
As she gets older, I plan to give similarly balanced messages about sex. Sex itself is a normal and healthy part of life. STDs are a potentially serious health issue. STDs can be avoided even if you are sexually active. It is important to do everything you can to avoid them. If you think you are at risk for an STD, it’s important to get tested and treated as soon as possible. And (this is the uniquely mom message), I will not be angry or think less of you if you get an STD, I will just do my best to help you.
Maybe this is what calling them normal would look like.
End Quote
Quote
Tuesday August 10, 2010
Should We Tell Our Kids that STDs are Normal?
by Martha Kempner
In a blog on Psychology Today’s website, Kathryn Stamoulis, a psychologist who specializes in adolescent sexuality and teens’ internet behaviors, suggests that it’s time we take the stigma out of sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) and start talking about them as a normal risk of a normal behavior. Her argument is quite logical: STDs are extremely prevalent in our society among both teens and adults, treating them like the ultimate social taboo does nothing to prevent teens from contracting them (years of abstinence-only-until-marriage programs and fear-based education have not reduced teen sex or the transmission of STDs), and what it may actually do is prevent teens from taking important steps to protect and treat themselves (like seeking out regular STD screening).
She suggests that STDs are a normal risk of sexual contact similar to how contracting a cold or a flu is a natural risk of being in close contact with others during the winter. “Just imagine what life would look like if people viewed STDs as a normal part of fooling around,” she writes. “Without fear of tarnishing his reputation, a teenage boy could tell his partner ‘you may not want to get too close to me this week; I'm clearing up a case of Chlamydia.’ Or a teen girl may view getting tested twice a year as routine as she does a teeth cleaning.”
She is absolutely right that stigma prevents many people from seeking the protective behaviors they need—be it buying condoms before having sex or getting tested for STDs afterwards. We do have to change our tone when talking about STDs to get rid of the shame and blame. STDs are a health issue; not a sign of poor morals or bad behavior.
But normal, is that taking it too far?
As a sexuality educator, I have spent a lot of time criticizing abstinence-only-until-marriage programs for their use of fear and shame especially when it comes to STDs. A common tactic of these programs is to show young people slides of STDs in their extremely advanced stages; cervixes that are dripping with pus or penises covered with cauliflower-sized warts. I do not think these are appropriate teaching tools for a number of reasons. First, they’re not particularly educational—these pictures represent late stages of STDs that in all honesty few people ever reach. If we do want to show young people pictures of STDs, at the very least we should be showing them those in the earliest stages in order to help them understand when to seek testing and treatment.
Second, the narration accompanying these slides often says things like “As a result of this Chlamydia infection, this young woman, even though she only had sex with one person, will never be able to have children.” Not only do such statements gloss over important information—like the fact that Chlamydia is easily cured with antibiotics if caught early and that even if caught later infertility can be averted—they also seem to suggest that the owner of the cervix in the picture is to blame for her predicament and, worse, is now damaged goods. Such message of fear and shame are always inappropriate.
Lastly, I think it is worth noting that those who support showing pictures of diseased genitals are the very same forces who try to censor any curriculum or book that shows pictures of naked people or healthy genitalia on the grounds that they are pornographic and not age-appropriate. This just further underscores the messages that sex, and even our bodies, are sources of shame.
As a mother who wants to protect her children from anything that causes pain or discomfort, though, I have to admit that calling STDs simply a normal part of fooling around makes me a little anxious. It is true that gonorrhea and Chlamydia can be treated easily, but other STDs, like Herpes, can cause recurring pain. And, we can’t forget about HIV which causes numerous medical issue and ultimately still leads to death.
I vividly remember an article I read when I was 14 about a 25-year-old woman who had a severe case of genital Herpes. She explained that urinating during an outbreak was so uncomfortable that she would not do it at work and would instead wait until the end of the day when she could do it as part of a shower or a bath to limit the pain. I don’t know whether the article was designed to scare me or simply to inform me but it sounded horrible enough that I vowed I would not get Herpes. To this day, I believe that some of my vigilance in protecting myself when I became sexually active came from that dread.
This is always one of the challenges of parenthood. How do we raise kids who have an awareness of and a respect for the dangers in the world without scaring them too much? Thus the balancing act. My daughter (who is 4) has to hold my hand when we’re walking in a parking lot because other drivers might not see her by herself and could “smush” her. She has to wear her seatbelt whenever we drive because it’s safer. And, she shouldn’t talk to strangers. I haven’t told her what would happen to her if she really did get smushed by a car, that people die in car accidents, or that some people are actually out to harm little kids. Some of these messages will come as she gets older and can understand more but I will try not to dwell on danger.
As she gets older, I plan to give similarly balanced messages about sex. Sex itself is a normal and healthy part of life. STDs are a potentially serious health issue. STDs can be avoided even if you are sexually active. It is important to do everything you can to avoid them. If you think you are at risk for an STD, it’s important to get tested and treated as soon as possible. And (this is the uniquely mom message), I will not be angry or think less of you if you get an STD, I will just do my best to help you.
Maybe this is what calling them normal would look like.
End Quote
Friday, April 16, 2010
Topic: Gang Violence Part III
Check out the following link for some things the community can do about gang violence, getting involved is the only way to make a difference!
http://www.ncjrs.gov/html/ojjdp/jjbul9910-1/comm.html
http://www.ncjrs.gov/html/ojjdp/jjbul9910-1/comm.html
Topic: Gang Violence Part II
Here are the listed warning signs that your loved one might be involved or at risk for involvement in a gang, or really, even just be in need of additional positive attention and support from others:
Behavioral signs:
- Attending school and/or work erratically
- Avoiding family activities
- Using different and unfamiliar words
- Associating with known gang members or known criminals
- Wanting to be alone all the time
- Staying out later than usual
- Drug or alcohol use
- Having money or buying things without a known source of income
- Mood Swings or unusual behavior patterns
Nonverbal communication signs:
- Highly stylized or strange writing
- Graffiti style writing on notebooks, books, or papers
- Using hand signals, and not on a bike
Physical signs:
- Changes in style of dressing
- Strange hair styles
- Presence of tattoos
- Sudden or over use of make-up
Topic: Gang Violence
Well, after last week I was thinking can the violence in children get any worse, yes I am learning now that it can. We are now focusing on gang violence in children.
Why would a child join a gang?
~Lack of social support.
~Low income.
~Nothing better to do.
~Media Influences.
Seriously, when you think about it, a gang offers you the chance to alleviate all of those things. Suddenly, you have a group of people that support you, help to take care of you, and give you something to do. Plus, your favorite movie is about gangs. All your missing pieces are here, but at what cost?
Here are the LAPD gang stats:
http://www.lapdonline.org/crime_maps_and_compstat/content_basic_view/24435
As one can see, there is a lot happening out there in L.A. But this is not just a California thing, gang issues are everywhere.
How can I find out more and avoid it for myself/my family/my loved ones?
Read here for more information:
http://www.lapdonline.org/get_informed/content_basic_view/1396
Why would a child join a gang?
~Lack of social support.
~Low income.
~Nothing better to do.
~Media Influences.
Seriously, when you think about it, a gang offers you the chance to alleviate all of those things. Suddenly, you have a group of people that support you, help to take care of you, and give you something to do. Plus, your favorite movie is about gangs. All your missing pieces are here, but at what cost?
Here are the LAPD gang stats:
http://www.lapdonline.org/crime_maps_and_compstat/content_basic_view/24435
As one can see, there is a lot happening out there in L.A. But this is not just a California thing, gang issues are everywhere.
How can I find out more and avoid it for myself/my family/my loved ones?
Read here for more information:
http://www.lapdonline.org/get_informed/content_basic_view/1396
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
Pink Shirt Day
http://www.pinkshirtday.ca/
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
Wear a pink shirt to support your distaste for bullies.
I think this goes well in line with what I have been discussing recently.
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
Wear a pink shirt to support your distaste for bullies.
I think this goes well in line with what I have been discussing recently.
(Just a goofy photo I made in photoshop in honor of this occasion)
Friday, April 9, 2010
Topic: Bullying Part III
Ahhh, you did not think I would forget what to do about the victims of bullying! Bullying causes PTSD and depression in many cases, lets not forget what damage is done to one's self esteem when they are bullied in any way.
What can you do?
If you know someone who is bullied:
~ Speak up! Your silence empowers the bullies to be more aggressive and feel as if they are untouchable.
~ Model positive actions to inspire others.
~ Use safe interventions such as contacting an authority that you feel comfortable talking to and trust.
~ Ignore the bully- sometimes they are just trying to upset you, don't let them.
~ Talk things out with the bully- calmly see what the bully wants and why they are doing this to you.
~ Report the bully- let an authority figure that you know and trust in on the problem.
~ Seek out the bullies parents- Have your parents discuss the issue with their parents.
Defend yourself:
~ Passive defense- walk away, don;t make eye contact, avoid run-ins.
~ Authoritative defense- pass on your responsibility of defense to an authority figure.
~ Physical defense- learn to keep yourself safe from physical abuse.
If your child/student is being bullied:
This site can teach you how to help your child/student to remain safe from bullying.
http://www.ihatebullies.net/prevent-bullying-%E2%80%93-how-parents-and-teachers-can-ward-off-bullying.html
This site also provides information to end this treatment.
http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/bullying/MH00126
What can you do?
If you know someone who is bullied:
~ Speak up! Your silence empowers the bullies to be more aggressive and feel as if they are untouchable.
~ Model positive actions to inspire others.
~ Use safe interventions such as contacting an authority that you feel comfortable talking to and trust.
~ Always inform school personnel when you see cruel behaviors, it can save a life.
~Reach out with your own friendship in some way to those who are targets of bullying or isolation.
If you are being bullied:~Reach out with your own friendship in some way to those who are targets of bullying or isolation.
~ Ignore the bully- sometimes they are just trying to upset you, don't let them.
~ Talk things out with the bully- calmly see what the bully wants and why they are doing this to you.
~ Report the bully- let an authority figure that you know and trust in on the problem.
~ Seek out the bullies parents- Have your parents discuss the issue with their parents.
Defend yourself:
~ Passive defense- walk away, don;t make eye contact, avoid run-ins.
~ Authoritative defense- pass on your responsibility of defense to an authority figure.
~ Physical defense- learn to keep yourself safe from physical abuse.
If your child/student is being bullied:
This site can teach you how to help your child/student to remain safe from bullying.
http://www.ihatebullies.net/prevent-bullying-%E2%80%93-how-parents-and-teachers-can-ward-off-bullying.html
This site also provides information to end this treatment.
http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/bullying/MH00126
Topic: Bullying Part II
So now we have discussed the sad effects of bullying, what can be done about bullies?
Well, as a parent here are some resources:
One of your best bets is having an empathetic and open relationship with your child. Recognizing their behaviors and what can indicate to you that they may have issues with this.
Here are some indicators:
http://www.education.com/reference/article/my-child-is-a-bully/
This article tells of what you can do if you learn that your child is bullying others.
http://kidshealth.org/parent/emotions/behavior/no_bullying.html
As an educator, here are some resources:
This information can be helpful to anyone but especially should be known and used by educators
http://www.stopbullyingnow.hrsa.gov/adults/teachers-corner.aspx
Training and workshops in bully prevention
http://www.stopbullyingnow.com/interven1.html
As a human being, here is another resource:
Letters to a Bullied Girl, a book by three teens. Two sisters heard of a bad bully experience another girl was having, and began a letter writing initiative to try to help the bullied girl.
http://www.teenreads.com/reviews/9780061544620-excerpt.asp
Well, as a parent here are some resources:
One of your best bets is having an empathetic and open relationship with your child. Recognizing their behaviors and what can indicate to you that they may have issues with this.
Here are some indicators:
http://www.education.com/reference/article/my-child-is-a-bully/
This article tells of what you can do if you learn that your child is bullying others.
http://kidshealth.org/parent/emotions/behavior/no_bullying.html
As an educator, here are some resources:
This information can be helpful to anyone but especially should be known and used by educators
http://www.stopbullyingnow.hrsa.gov/adults/teachers-corner.aspx
Training and workshops in bully prevention
http://www.stopbullyingnow.com/interven1.html
As a human being, here is another resource:
Letters to a Bullied Girl, a book by three teens. Two sisters heard of a bad bully experience another girl was having, and began a letter writing initiative to try to help the bullied girl.
http://www.teenreads.com/reviews/9780061544620-excerpt.asp
Topic: Bullying
Today I am learning about the prevalence and resolution for bullying in schools. Children are often bullied so badly that it causes trauma and depression in the children that are victimized. Some children "do something about it" which usually means taking lives. Sometimes the life they take is their own and sometimes it is of those who did things or did not stop others from doing things to them, and sometimes it is that of anyone. " Bullying statistics show that 77% of students are bullied mentally, verbally, & physically."
Please refer to these cases for more information:
Ryan Halligan
A sweet boy whose life was cut short after bully issues
http://www.ryanpatrickhalligan.org/
Jared High
Another amazing child whose life ended early as a result of bullying
http://www.jaredstory.com/
Please refer to these cases for more information:
Ryan Halligan
A sweet boy whose life was cut short after bully issues
http://www.ryanpatrickhalligan.org/
Jared High
Another amazing child whose life ended early as a result of bullying
http://www.jaredstory.com/
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)